Here, have some Film Noir class quotes!

M: He has a very pretentious writing style.
Chris (the professor): He's an academic writer.
M: Yeah, but-
Chris: That's all I'm going to say.

Once you've seen Bad Boys II, there's not much left. --Chris

Nosferatu!
Doesn't that name sound like the very midnight call of death? Speak it not aloud, or its life's pictures will turn to pale shadows and nightmares will rise up to feed on your blood. --Opening titles for "Nosferatu", now printed out and put on my door.

Actually, cats are sometimes used as a symbol indicating a woman that doesn't get a lot of sex. --Chris, regarding "Nosferatu"

It's always fun to brighten your afternoon with Nazi propoganda. --Chris, regarding "Triumph of the Will"

The TV is very Pro-Israel. It's refusing to air your propoganda on principle. --Me

...and if it doesn't work, then we can talk about machines and how they've destroyed our lives. --Chris

Argen: He [Hitler] salutes like a pansy man.
Chris: When you have an army that huge backing you up, you can salute however you want.

[Nazis salute]
Me: You must be THIS TALL to enter the ride!
[Hitler salutes back]
Me: Somebody's FABULOUS!

I'm lost at the plot of The Cosby Show, which is a very sad commentary as to my intellect. --Chris

But, I mean... all our male leads have been morons, right? --Chris

At the time, it was the most expensive non-Michael Jackson video. Back then, he was spending all his money on videos and not legal funds. --Chris, regarding a Madonna video inspired by "Metropolis"

Argen: At the time, I was going to make a comparison with Austin Powers' fembots, but...
Chris: I'd prefer if you didn't.

Chris: Does anyone else have anything they want to contribute?
Me: Well, we could compare the flooding of the city to the destruction of Isengard--
Chris: NO.

Your papers can have any topic, just as long as I don't get 16 papers on Tim Burton. --Chris

Just shovel on the hubris! --M, regarding "Metropolis"

It's one of those things where when you see it, you just don't want to be human. --Chris, regarding the "Wing Bowl", in which a 90-pound Asian girl won the Philadelphia buffalo wing eating contest

AUUUUGH! Gratuitous crotch shot! --Me, during M

And it seems to be the fate of this class... I'm going to end with a comparison to Lord of the Rings. --Argen's partner, whose name I don't know, regarding M. (He compared Peter Lorre's performance at the end to Gollum, which is actually true. Chris tells us that Andy and the Gollum animators were actually partially inspired by the movie and based some of the characterization on M's murderer. And now you know!)

Someone: Thanks for raising the bar, Argen!
Chris: Yes. From now on, from everyone I want slide presentations and music and Madonna videos. You all have to find a Madonna video inspired by your film.


In other news, this amuses me.